Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Past Perfect

The 2008 NFL schedule was officially released this afternoon and now is the time for all good men to discuss the sexiest pairings of the upcoming season. What, you can't break down the bumper crop of offensive lineman in next week's draft for the umpteenth time? "He said, she said" with Brett Favre not being able to give it up has skinned the cat that got your tongue? I could make many observations about my local squad, The New England Patriots, but I'll keep it succinct. Business trips to Shamu's Privates to take on The Bolts in Week 6 and Hoosier (dare I discover the origin of the term 'hoosier') Central for a date with The Colts in Week 9. I was tempted to call them 'The Horseshoes', I'm even more tempted to insinuate that they should have a mascot in the shape of a horseshoe named Ringer that drunken Hoosiers could fling onion rings or better yet, an Awesome Blossom. I'm sure Outback would love that and the sheilas rejoice.

Both games are on Sunday nights so make sure you spank your sister after the 4:15pm games so she'll have a spring in her step come kickoff. My favorite matchup will be the other Sunday night tilt (there's a possibility that NBC will pull another early Sunday matchup during the latter half of the year for their flex matchup, but there's a cap on the number of primetime games a team can play) when they visit the artificial 12th man in Seattle versus The Seahawks. I'm sure Peter King will be at the game drinking Starbucks and he'll have something to say about it in his Monday column.

I'm not drinking any Kool-Aid, but I'll say it, as much as I'd like to see a perfect season from New England in 2008, I don't want to see it happen. I probably wouldn't be able to watch football ever again. But I thought that was the case when I felt like I was sucker punched after the AFC Championship loss to Indy in 2007 and the most recent Super Bowl versus The Giants (I still think Fox fixed the game, they are 'The Devil's Channel, but that's my conspiracy theory for another day). The collective romanticism that would result from an undefeated, unblemished Super Bowl championship team would exceed that of Jim Nantz during a Masters weekend. A season without defeat would be the ultimate accomplishment, but where do you go from there? It would be a tall order to live up to that singular season in every season after that. Bill Belichick has found ways to movitate his championship rosters of the past. But do you really want to become like Mercury Morris? He's the guy at your school reunion that has held onto his past for way too long.

Sure it's great to have a memory, but the band must play on. There's more music to be heard. That's what athletics is all about, the ebb and flow of the pursuit. I hope the Patriots win every time they take the field, but if they don't, it'll be something to vent about. With that being said, I hope to see them in Tampa at the end of the year for Super Bowl XLIII. I predict that they'll face the Dallas Cowboys and win 34-20.